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A
Powerful Healing
 It
was in the midst of internal meltdown, during a series of
spiritual and relational impasses, that Kairos came into my
life. By age 43, I had been so traumatized by a steady diet
of rigid religiosity, spousal betrayal and the effects of
sexual addiction, bankruptcy, and lack of intimacy over 25
years of marriage, that even my best attempts at prayer, reconciliation,
counseling, and forgiveness in the traditional church setting
weren’t working. I was too walled off from myself and
God; afraid of others and my own true reality; afraid of what
might happen if I really uncorked the bottled-up struggles
and pain.
Where could I go? How could I trust? My soul
had prayed and cried itself dry with hopelessness. I told
myself, Whatever else I have tried hasn’t made much
sense or been much help. Why not risk the invitation to try
something “new” called Kairos? Why not see if
there’s healing down this road? What is there to lose
now, since I’ve already lost faith in so much already?
In Kairos I gradually came to discover a welcome
and loving relief…by being gently taught how to honor
silence, tears, painful memories, my inner voice, soul longings,
bodily stresses, limitations, fears, joys, and dreams. I was
exposed to a seemingly endless variety of spiritual exercises,
readings and poetry from classical and contemporary authors
under the guided solace of spiritual direction. Before long
the healing began. It started to show; first through the eyes
of others, then to me.
There is no denying that I am not the same
person after time spent in Kairos. My sense of purpose for
living and loving God, myself, and others has been renewed
and revitalized beyond expectation.
But it’s not what you think of what
I say about Kairos that matters most to me; it’s what
your soul is saying to you right now about Kairos and what
it needs to experience that really matters. Go with your heart
on this one…healing will follow.
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